Balance In Chaos? Cool. But Like... How Though?

A Blog Mini-Series on Getting Your Life Together lol

(From someone who had to do the same thing)


What is life if not a complete whirlwind of chaos? A neverending cycle of highs and lows? A thrill ride you can only ride once?


I mean, when you figure in that most adults have jobs, significant others, children, hobbies, dreams, goals, aspirations, finances to consider, and responsibilities 'out the wazoo,' it's no wonder why trying to find any kind of balance in the hustle and bustle of our everyday lives is such a tall order to fill.


Me, for example, I'm a wife, mother, teacher, author, friend, and so much more. However, I can't let all the hats I wear overwhelm me, and I would bet that neither can you.


So how do I manage it? Find balance in the chaos?


Here, every month in my blog, I'm going to be giving you step-by-step instructions to do exactly that, and this is that first step...


I'm no master, that's for sure. I'm always learning or trying to implement better ways of doing things, but I would say that the biggest contributor to any kind of healthy and happy lifestyle is your mindset, above all else.


It's literally the beginning of everything.


If you're sitting there telling yourself that you're not good at something, that you'll never reach XYZ goal, that there's no way you'll ever make enough money to live the kind of life you want to live, or even that you're a dumpster fire of a human being (how dare you say that about yourself?! lol), all you're doing is setting yourself up for failure.


It doesn't take long for all those negative thoughts to become your reality if that's all you're ever telling yourself.


Having a healthy mindset, in my experience, starts with getting rid of those destructive, detrimental thoughts. Be that as it may, I'm also too well-versed in them myself to say that simply thinking of happier things or turning each negative thought into a positive one will do any good for everyone, because it didn't work for me.


"What? Telling someone to calm down when they're stressed out isn't the best thing to do?" Haha, go figure.


What did work for me, however, was taking ownership over every aspect of my life, thoughts included. No, I can't control everything, and there will always be X-factor things popping up out of nowhere because that's how life works, but by taking ownership, by saying, "This is my life, these are my choices, my decisions," you're taking your life into your own hands and giving yourself the power to mold it like clay into the life you want to live.


I had to break my life down into segments (those hats I mentioned earlier), and I had to do a thorough inventory of what was going wrong, what was going right, what had to change for me to be happy, and what I would like to change if I were given the chance - things that I wanted but would still be happy, even if I had to wait a while for them.


This was my list:

ME, AS A PERSON

Wife

Mother

Homeschool Teacher

Author

Entrepreneur

Person who resides in a dwelling I'd like to like

Person with a license who wants to go places ALL the time

And person who wants all the freedom she can get


For me, those segments began with ME AS A PERSON, no matter how awkward and new that concept may have been for me.


"What? There's a reason flight attendants tell their passengers to put a mask on themselves AND THEN put them on their children?" Yeah, for some of us, it's a hard pill to swallow to realize that you have to take care of yourself before you can have any hope of being your best for others, but the fact is, you have to. It sounds cliche, I know, but it's real.


I questioned everything and finally took into account what I truly thought and felt.

What did I like about my life? What didn't I like? What needed to change?


Here are a few of the things I came up with:

  • I hated how empty my skin was, and how every time I sat down to draw something, I couldn't get a landscape out to save my life; I was always coming up with what I wanted as a tattoo.

  • I loved how committed I was to not only having, raising, and maintaining my family but also how much joy my family brings to my life. However, I wasn't spending nearly enough quality time with them, given how much I was working. I mean, there were days when I felt like I only saw them for school and mealtimes. That simply wasn't enough for the kind of life I wanted.

  • Our finances weren't anywhere near where I wanted them to be. I hated living from paycheck to paycheck, spending every single day working long hours, even on weekends, only to find that I couldn't go get what I needed or wanted when I needed or wanted them. I loathed the fact that I couldn't go get more washi tape for this new book I was plotting or having to wait to get ink for my printer because that stuff is a hundred bucks a pop.

When I broke my life down like that and made quite a few lists to go along with them, the next step was to go through each of them with a fine-toothed comb and make a plan for each and everything listed.


If you've read this far, I'm assuming you're either a really avid fan (if so, you're awesome!) or you've read something here that you think may help you in your life (I really hope that's the case).


So that's what I'm going to challenge you to do over the course of the next month - really sit down and break your life up into the areas you value most, deep within your soul, and make these lists:

  • AREA 1, 2, 3, etc.

And for each of those areas, make these lists:

  • LOVE

  • HATE

  • NEED TO DO/CHANGE

  • WANT TO DO/CHANGE


In the next post on this topic (5/28/22), I'll give you the next step - how to make a plan with all of your lists.



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